Mall’s Phone Message Is a Lemon

If you have 50 seconds to kill and want to be irritated, call (949) 364-1771 and listen to the Shops at Mission Viejo’s telephone recording.

“Thank you for calling Simon’s, the Shops at Mission Viejo shopping line, sponsored by Mercedes-Benz of Laguna Niguel, the Mercedes-Benz of Mercedes-Benz centers,” the chirpy female voice says. “If you would like more information on Mercedes-Benz of Laguna Niguel, press 1 now.”

Assuming you inadvertently called the mall when what you really wanted was “the Mercedes-Benz of Mercedes-Benz centers,” you can press 1 and hear about the dealer’s “state-of-the-art facility” (conveniently located just around the corner from the mall), which has more than 600 new and pre-owned vehicles. You will also learn it is also possible to call the car dealership directly at (949) 347-3700 or (800) NEWBENZ.

If, on the other hand, you were actually calling about something related to the mall, there are other options. For example, you can press 4 to hear about the Shops’ special events, 5 to learn what jobs are available, 7 to chat with security and 0 for “guest information.”

Choices, choices.